Another week, another arbitrary rule is bent. Two (companion) tracks this week.
This week six years ago, in March 2020, the Thing happened. In our house, it was a weird one (OK, so it was weird for everyone). At work, we officially sent everyone home on the 20th, but I had already been working from home for a couple of days because we’d already taken the kids out of school sick. Then the Thing officially happened, and that was it. Most of our staff were furloughed; I would occasionally call down to work to wave at my boss across a room and check the buildings were OK, but once we had (as safely as we could) dealt with all our students and their belongings, we were done.
My main memory of the first working-from-home phase of the Thing – the bit with the amazing weather here in the UK – was sitting in our front box room, at a makeshift desk, waving across the road at our neighbour PM, sitting in his box room at his makeshift desk, before we both went back to pretending we were just working like normal human beings.
I pulled up my last.fm profile to see what the comfort music was. A lot of John Mayer. A lot of Nickel Creek. A lot of John Mark McMillan. All these have been mentioned already. But then, at some point, the combination of Youtube Music and Spotify started throwing up new things: some of which, in my head, are now forever enshrined as the soundtrack to the thing,
There were three albums which dominated for a while. The first, Sean Watkins and the Bee Eaters, This is Who We Are, already got a hat-tip in a previous post and a couple of footnotes in this series.1 But then we morphed into June, and Phoebe Bridgers launched her incredible sophomore album, Punisher. The singles from it are brilliant – but I love Chinese Satellite the most.
Lockdown. Looking out the window. Feeling numb. Crunching up eyes and trying to make the figures in Excel work so that we can get to the end of Q4 without having to max out an overdraft. Pitching budgets and contingency plans on Zoom. Listening to staff on Zoom for that one time a week they log on. Standing out in the garden in glorious sunshine thinking, this isn’t so bad really, but then remembering that it really is.
I want to believe,
Instead, I look at the sky, and I feel nothing
You know I hate to be alone
I want to be wrong
Phoebe Bridgers, in this incredible song summing up her struggles with agnosticism and faith, capturing the hole inside every human being. I’ve used it in a sermon. But I’ve absolutely felt it.2
But we’re going for a double-A-side this week, because there was another album I was obsessed with just before Punisher came out. I think this ended up in my suggested listening because of a sonic link, somehow, to FRMR’s Inver 3 – the incredible Amish/Appalacian-space-exporatory sonic experience that is Silicone Boone’s The Reaches, and the best track on it – Found You.
Again, the whole album is really a single piece, and rewards careful listening, but Found You seems particularly profound to me. It also includes the answer to Phoebe Bridgers’ prayer as it points to the truth of something bigger than us which provides meaning, purpose, and a reason to be – even in a moment when it felt like the world was changing forever.
Well I ain’t worth much, my face is far too common
You could stack me up, still I’d be forgotten
I’ve never found a place among the chosen
Ahh but I rode the wave that gives the world its motion
Yes, I found youYou’re why we leave home
Why we’ve always roamed
Why we’re not alone
- But it’s great. Another mention for their cover of Graceland, but the whole album is one that rewards listening to it as an album. ↩︎
- Phoebe Bridgers’ first album, Stranger in the Alps, is good, but the 2019 concept album with Connor Oberst, Better Oblivion Community Center, is great: the lead single, Dylan Thomas, should really be on 40×40. Now it’s here, I can add it to the Spotify playlist regardless. ↩︎
- FRMR will be the subject of a future entry in this series, so we’ll not say too much for now. ↩︎